James Thomas Hazard
There once was a
man-
Call him Bob-
Who lived on a
hill
Far removed from
the mob.
“I’m a self-made
man”
He would boast in
his manor
“And deserve all
my wealth,
High status and
glamour.
“The schools that
I went to
Were built by
yours truly
And paid for by
money
You demanded so
rudely.
“Our whole banking
system,
And the laws that
protect it,
Were not around
Before I existed.
“The hospital,
too,
That restored me
to health,
Where would it be
If it weren’t for
my wealth?
“And as for the
workers
They’d starve in a
ditch
If they didn’t
have someone
Like me to make
rich.
“All the
inventions,
The gadgets and
science
Are due to my own
Complete
self-reliance.”
He lived his own
life
And built his own
tomb
Even spoke at his
wake
In a big, empty
room.
Now he’s in heaven
Telling God to his
face
“It’s me you
should thank
For this fabulous
place.”